Finding Joy in the Little Things

One of my roles here at COTP is fostering two incredibly awesome kiddos, each of whom has special needs.  S has lived with me for the past year and a half and W joined our home a little over a year ago.  Even though the past 1.5 years have been super challenging for them medically, I love having the opportunity to foster them and to walk alongside them in this season of their life.  When you’re parenting kids with special needs you don’t always get to celebrate the “typical” milestones that other people do.  Their first birthdays were both truly a celebration of the fact that they even made it to that milestone!  People often ask me if they’ve started walking or talking yet, because those are the typical things you’d expect kids this age to be doing.  It can feel defeating to repeatedly tell people all the things your kids can’t do.  Instead I choose to focus on all the things these two little miracle babies can do.

S has a very complex past medical history, including two occasions when she had a cardiac arrest and had CPR to revive her.  For a lot of reasons she has a very extreme oral aversion and gets most of her nutrition via a G-tube in her stomach.  But she has made incredible progress over the past year and can now take in small amounts of food by mouth.  This past week she ate a goldfish cracker.  One whole goldfish cracker!  It took her twenty minutes, but she did it!  What an accomplishment that was for her!  I was amazed and so incredibly proud. 

W is almost fifteen-months-old and has very low tone, he’s still working to be able to hold his head up.  He’s also severely vision impaired.  Between his low tone and vision impairment it’s hard for him to play with most toys in the way that other kids do.  This weekend he had his arm up in the air and I kissed his hand, which will always get him to smile.  He then started to wave his hand around in the air, trying to find me, and smiling whenever he touched my face and I kissed his hand.  Later in the day he had a toy piano beside him that flashes bright lights (which he can see) and plays music.  His hand touched the keys once and started the music, then he did it again, and again.  I could see the look on his face that he was figuring it out.  The little wheels in his head were turning as he was discovering that he could make the music play.  That was the first day he did something intentional with his arms and I was so proud of him.  It was such a small thing, but for him it was huge!

Our days here look a little different.  They’re filled with lots of medications, therapies, braces, and feeding tubes.  I haven’t been able to celebrate a first word or first step yet.  But I promise you that I was even prouder of them for the milestones that they reached this week.  This week we are celebrating goldfish crackers and toy pianos.  To think, I could have missed out on the joy of those accomplishments, if they were developing in a “typical” way.  Instead my heart is bursting with joy and pride in the little things.  Thank you Jesus that I get to be witness to these miracles first hand every day.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made -Psalm 139:14  

Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site.  Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.

Dear W

I intended to write to you for your first birthday.  But as always time got away from me.  So I hope you’ll forgive me and instead I thought I’d write to you today, commemorating one year since you came to live at COTP.

I look back at pictures from when you first came home and I can hardly believe that’s you.  You were so tiny, so sick, and just so so fragile.  You looked like a wrinkled eighty year old man in a four pound body. You had a lot of acute issues for us to deal with right off the bat, namely malnutrition, jaundice, pertussis, and poor feeding.  Those pertussis coughing spells when you struggled to breath were so scary, especially when you were already so weak. The only good thing about pertussis was that it meant you had to be isolated, so we had five days of one on one time. After your rough start in life, it seemed only appropriate to give you a little extra TLC and one on one care.  It was clear right from the start what a sweet little man you were.  It was also clear that you were going to have me wrapped around your little finger.

Even though that first week was so rough, you were continually getting better and stronger. Soon your sunken eyes and sagging skin were replaced with chubby cheeks and rolls on your thighs.  It seemed like we had overcome your medical difficulties.  But as the months went by, I learned that there was more going on in your little body than we initially knew.  Your rough start in life has left you with some long term medical issues.  In fact these last three months have been really, really tough as a result of some of those issues.  I’ve struggled to find answers, something to make you feel better.  I wish I could take away all of your pain and struggles, but I can’t.  So together we’ll keep looking for answers and praying for Jesus to bring healing to your little body.

You love to be read to and really enjoy textured board books that you can feel.  Your favorite song is Joy by Housefires, you always smile and love to dance when it comes on.  It’s perfect for you, because not only are you such a joyful little boy but you bring so much joy to those around you too.  Though you’re not a fan of the pool you love bath/shower time and getting a good massage with your post bath time lotion.  I love the way your whole face lights up and you kick your legs when I pick you up out of your crib in the morning.  Your absolute favorite thing in the world is snuggling and rocking in the rocking chair, it might just be one of my favorite things too.  When you smile you have the cutest dimples and little gap between your two front teeth.  You already love it when we pray and flash that sweet smile whenever I say “amen”.

Every day I pray for your health, that you’ll know how much God loves you, and that you’ll be with your forever family very soon.  I don’t know how many days you’ll be in my arms and under my roof.  But I know that for as long as that is, I’ll cherish you.  I’ll fight for you.  I’ll protect you.  And I’ll most definitely love you. 

Happy one year little man, you are so very loved!

Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site.  Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.

Happy Easter! Bon Fet Pak!

It's crazy that this is already my third year celebrating Easter here in Haiti.  Today's celebration included some goodies for the kids (thanks Mom, Julie, and Annie!), a worship service here at COTP, a grilled turkey with friends, and Skype time with my family in Florida.  What a blessed day to celebrate our risen savior.  

"He is not here, for He has RISEN as He said." -Matthew 28:6

Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site. Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.

Psalm 126:2

Our mouths were filled with laughter, 

our tongues with songs of joy. 

Then it was said among the nations, 

"The Lord has done great things for them."

-Psalm 126:2 

Way To Go Baby S!

Today we threw a party to celebrate a big milestone in a little girl’s life.  It wasn’t a birthday party or a going home celebration, as most of our parties at COTP are.  Instead it was a party to celebrate baby S and her completion of one year of tuberculosis therapy!  

S's first and last dose of TB meds

A year ago today S was so very, very sick.  It had taken me a couple days to get her the medication she needed. When I got home with the pills I immediately began to prepare a suspension, so I could get the medication into her tiny body.  I pushed the red liquid into her NG tube and felt a sense of relief.  She was getting what she needed now, the medicine would fight the infection, and she could start to heal.  Ten minutes later she vomited up the entire dose and I felt completely defeated.  That sort of set the tone for how the next year would go.  Nothing about S's treatment was easy, every step of the way was a fight.  But after a year of struggling to get S what she needed, for the first time in 365 days we woke up today and I didn’t have to squirt that red medicine into her mouth, or a NG tube, or a G-tube, and pray that it would stay down.  Today we woke up and celebrated.  After a year of medications, weeks on and off a ventilator, too many intubations to count, blood transfusions, a surgery, and two cardiac arrests, S has beaten all the odds, and for that we are infinitely grateful to God.

S, I can’t wait to see what God does with your life, because I’m pretty sure He has something big planned.  I hope you know how very loved you are and that you have a whole army of supporters cheering you on.  I'm so grateful for the way they've rallied around you for the past year.

So let me just say thank you...

To Amy, for joining me in the fight for you that first week when you were so very, very sick.  I bet she never thought she’d be placing NG tubes, running feeding pumps, and monitoring oxygen sats when we became roommates, but Amy has always stepped up to do whatever was needed to help take care of you.

To Joel, who probably lost a few years off his life and almost lost a jeep in his determination to get you to Port Au Prince and to the ventilator that would save your life.

To Carla, who would answer my calls or texts at all hours of the day when I needed someone to listen or to join me in prayer for you.

To Tori, who jumped on a plane to come help us when you arrested unexpectedly after your surgery and we just needed an extra set of hands and a friend to help us through that rough patch.

To Sheila, who also joined in to help care for you in those early days when you needed to be monitored 24/7.

To your nannies, Ermanise and Christianese, for spending countless hours at your bedside in the hospital when I couldn’t be there.

To the Doorlag kids, for putting so many smiles on your face by loving you and playing with you.

To the staff and volunteers at Bernard Mevs, who provided you with the best medical care in all of Haiti.

To the COTP family of supporters, for praying for you and for helping to cover your medical expenses.

You did it, S, and we are so very proud of you!

Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site. Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.

Six Months of Baby W

Today marks six months since this little guy, baby W, came to live at COTP.  He was so fragile when he first came home.  His jaundiced skin hung off of his thin arms and legs.  He had the tell-tale cough of pertussis, which is scary in any baby, but particularly in a four pound malnourished baby without any reserves.  His treatment regimen consisted of antibiotics, a feeding tube, oxygen to help him through the rough coughing spells, and a whole lot of love.  There were a few rough nights when I didn't know if that would be enough.  But praise God it was, and little W is now not so little any more! He has the most infectious giggle, the cutest dimples, and the way he coos is almost too cute to handle.  This boy brings so much joy to those around him and I am so grateful for the opportunity to take care of him during this season of his life.

Admit day

Today

Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site. Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.

Looking back on this past year we’ve seen God come through in some incredible ways with all that has happened at COTP in 2016.  Several kids’ adoptions were finalized and they joined their forever families.  Many kids overcame some serious medical challenges.  We were able to serve so many families through our outpatient formula and Medika Mamba programs.  Each one of those kids has a name and a story, and we’re grateful for the chance to be a part of it.  But I’d like to share the story of just one little boy named Keven.

Keven lived with us at COTP for a little over two years.  He was abandoned at a local hospital and came to live at COTP a little while before his second birthday.  Keven wasn’t your “typical” little boy.  He wasn’t able to walk or talk like the other kids in his home. He had a lot of feeding issues.  He was sick a lot.  He needed a lot of therapy.  While it might have been easy to see all the things Keven couldn’t do, there was plenty that he could do.  He communicated in his own way, through his smiles, through the way he’d wave his hands and feet in the air.  He let us know what he did and did not like.

In April Keven got sick.  He spent time in the hospital.  After coming home he spent countless days in his bed or his chair, being loved and cared for by his foster parent,Tori.  Feeding tubes, oxygen, suction machines, medication after medication, he was a sick little boy.  Keven would get a little better, but then he’d get sick again before his body had any real chance to recover.  In September Keven got really sick.   He was battling an aspiration pneumonia and we really didn’t think he was going to recover.  Tori and I talked about our goals for Keven and more than anything we wanted him to be where he was comfortable and loved.  We didn’t want him to pass away in a hospital bed, away from his home, away from those who cared for him the most.  We agreed that we would keep Keven at COTP.

Somehow Keven managed to prove us wrong again. He showed some baby steps of improvement and Tori put together the most memorable fourth birthday party for him.  What a blessing that was, to get to celebrate this little guy!

Then, about a month ago, Keven took a turn for the worse again.  Though he had proved us wrong many times before, we knew that is was unlikely he’d recover again.  We continued to make Keven’s comfort our number one priority.  Tori did such an amazing job attending to his needs.  One night we were praying for Keven and, through the tears, it was obvious how much he was loved.  There were so many tears and it was so hard to watch him struggle, because we loved this little boy so very much.

Last night Keven passed away in his sleep.  We were able to do something that isn’t often done in Haiti, to give him a peaceful passing.  We were able to treat his symptoms and he wasn’t in pain or struggling to breath.  He was in his home, beside Tori, and was comfortable.  This might seem like an odd story to share with you, when talking about all the big things that have been accomplished this past year, certainly there were many stories with “happier” endings I could have chosen to share.  But when I reflect on all the things God did in 2016, Keven will most certainly be on my mind.  We didn’t know how many days Keven would be with us at COTP, but God did.  Keven was only on this earth for four years, but during that time he was so very loved.  He was well cared for.  He was cherished for exactly who he was.  So while the outcome may not have been what we hoped for, we take great comfort in knowing that Keven was incredibly valued and loved for the time that he was ours at COTP.  We are so grateful for the years we had with him and we are so appreciative of those of you who support us here at COTP, and enable us to provide this level of love and care for Keven and the other kids entrusted into our care.

"Do not let your heart be troubled.  You believe in God; believe also in me.  My Father's house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you?  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.  You know the way to the place where I am going." -John 14:1-4 


Children of the Promise has given permission for the posting of the photos on this site. Photos taken of  the children in the care of Children of the Promise are not to be posted publicly without explicit permission given by Children of the Promise.